El Tango de Rachel
by Jtree
Summary: What if Chandler had never slipped about Ross' feelings for Rachel while he was in China?


El Tango de Rachel  
  
What would have happened if Chandler never slipped and accidentally told Rachel about Ross feelings while he was in China? How would things have turned up? Here's my theory.  
  
"...Feelings I can't fight..." - El Tango de Roxanne, Moulin Rouge  
  
[Monica & Rachel's. The gang minus Ross is there watching TV]  
  
Rachel: Ugh, how can you watch this?  
  
Joey: What are you talking about? This is happens to be a classic.  
  
Chandler: Yeah, Rach. It's not a movie unless it stars Bruce Willis.  
  
Phoebe: Oh, I know.  
  
Joey: See, Phoebe likes it.  
  
Phoebe: Yeah, I totally loved "The Kid"!  
  
Monica/Rachel: Oh! I know! (Chandler and Joey sigh, they look defeated. Ross enters with Julie)  
  
Ross: Hey guys!  
  
The gang: Hey! You're Back! (All rush to hug him)  
  
Joey: Hey, who's the girl?  
  
Ross: Oh, guys. Meet Julie. Julie and I were in grad school together.  
  
All: Oh, nice to meet you! Pleasure! Cool!  
  
Julie: Yeah, but we haven't seen each other since.  
  
Ross: Yeah, and when I got to China, guess who's in charge of the dig!  
  
Chandler: That's great, man!  
  
Ross: Yeah, I just wanted to say hi and introduce you guys before I unpacked. So, Julie this is everyone. That's Joey (Joey winks, Ross gives him a look), Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and of course Rachel.  
  
Rachel: So you're from here then?  
  
Julie: Yeah, New York.  
  
Ross: All right, well it's 4 in the morning our time, so we better get some shut-eye. Bye guys!  
  
The gang: Bye Ross! Good night! See ya! (They leave)  
  
Rachel: Well, she seemed nice.  
  
Monica: Yeah, she was. (The girls leave to the living room)  
  
Chandler: (to Joey) Finally, he found someone.  
  
Joey: I know.  
  
[Cut to the stairwell of the building, we see Ross and Julie coming down the stairs]  
  
Ross: I'm so glad you liked them.  
  
Julie: Well, I'm sure I'll get to know them better later.  
  
Ross: Oh, yeah. Hey, what'd you think of Rachel?  
  
Julie: Well, she seemed nice from what I could tell. (They reach outside)  
  
Ross: Awesome, I can't wait for you guys to talk, she's great.  
  
Julie: I'm sure. Hey, honey I'm gonna just catch a cab home.  
  
Ross: You sure?  
  
Julie: Yeah, I'll be fine. Bye! (They kiss, and she hails a cab)  
  
[Next day. Joey and Chandler's. Joey, Chandler, and Ross are there. AN: This is the longest descriptive day ever! It just never ends! Especially when you're writing it!]  
  
Ross: Hey, you guys got any cereal?  
  
Chandler: You're actually asking for food. HERE.  
  
Ross: Right, sorry I asked. Oh, what'd you guys think of Julie?  
  
Joey: She looked nice. Kinda short. How does that work?  
  
Ross: What do you mean?  
  
Joey: Y'know, sex-wise.  
  
Chandler: (ignoring Joey) Well, she seemed great, Ross. Glad you finally met someone!  
  
Ross: Thanks. She's really great, actually. Oh, and I have to thank you so much Chandler! If you hadn't finally snapped me out of the Rachel fantasy I would never have gone for her.  
  
Chandler: Oh, well no problem.  
  
Joey: So, you're really over Rachel then?  
  
Ross: Pretty much. I think I'm finally in that place where we can be friends. It's like, yesterday, when I came back, I saw her and I honestly just didn't feel much at all.  
  
Joey: Sounds like Julie's a miracle pill.  
  
Ross: Hehe, kinda.  
  
[Cut to Monica and Rachel's. Monica and Rachel are in their pajamas at the kitchen table eating breakfast]  
  
Rachel: Great eggs, Mon!  
  
Monica: Thanks, Rach. Ready to have fun today?  
  
Rachel: Oh, you bet. Just you, Pheebs, and me. No work, just a perfectly perfect day.  
  
Monica: You got that right. (Phoebe enters carrying a box)  
  
Phoebe: Hey girls! I'm here! The fun can begin!  
  
Monica: Mornin' Pheebs.  
  
Phoebe: Good morning! Oh, you're still in your pajamas!  
  
Rachel: Is that bad?  
  
Phoebe: No, I'll just catch up. (Takes off her overcoat revealing her pajamas, she sits down at the table)  
  
Monica: Just the girls today. I must admit it was a little weird not having Ross around, feel like I should be doing something with him, I mean he just got back!  
  
Rachel: True, and I did miss him too. Was it just me or did that coat look great on him yesterday? (Monica gives a shrug, Phoebe nods in agreement) But hey, remember Mon he's got Julie to keep him busy now.  
  
Phoebe: Oh yeah. Man her aura was screwed up.  
  
Monica: How so?  
  
Phoebe: It just seemed to have this feel of pending sadness and heartbreak. (AN: I love foreshadowing!)  
  
Monica: How strange.  
  
Rachel: All right, so it's official girls' day out. What do we do?  
  
Phoebe: Ooo, I have the perfect idea!  
  
Monica: What?  
  
Phoebe: Umm...let's get drunk?  
  
Monica: Definitely, but later.  
  
Rachel: Right now, how about we finish eating our cereal. And then we ask Phoebe what's in the box she brought.  
  
Phoebe: Oh! Right. See, I figured we'd have trouble figuring out what we wanted to do, so I went ahead and rented...drumroll please (Monica does the drumroll)...a video camera!  
  
Monica: Oh awesome, Phoebe!  
  
Rachel: Cool! What do we do with it?  
  
Phoebe: Whatever we want! We can make some original music videos, follow people around and make them nervous...anything!  
  
Monica: Sounds like a plan.  
  
Rachel: All right, Pheebs. (They high five)  
  
[Central Perk, later that day. Ross, Julie, Chandler, and Joey are present. Joey is reading the comics]  
  
Chandler: I can't believe you told her!  
  
Ross: It was years ago in GRAD school! How was I to know she'd remember?  
  
Julie: Really, Chandler. He was just impressing her with college stories back then.  
  
Chandler: Still, Ross you promised! (Joey laughs at the newspaper, not really paying attention to the rest)  
  
Joey: (laughing) Charlie Brown, you always fall for it. (Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe enter dressed and laughing, they hurry to where the rest are sitting, and Joey finally looks up from the comics)  
  
Rachel: (quickly) Hey boys, hello Ross, hey Julie.  
  
Ross: (chuckling) What are you girls up to?  
  
Phoebe: We've decided we finally want to know just what Gunther does in that little office of his.  
  
Rachel: With this! (Shows the camera from under her coat)  
  
Chandler: My, aren't we the little spies today. Where'd the camera come from?  
  
Monica: Phoebe rented it from the A/V store down the street.  
  
Ross: You can rent video cameras?  
  
Phoebe: You can when the manager's your massage client.  
  
Joey: How do you plan to get the camera in there?  
  
Monica: Simple, Rachel distracts him while we plan it. Then we sit and wait for an hour and get it back while Rachel distracts him again.  
  
Ross: D-D-Distract him? (Julie looks at Ross kind of funny)  
  
Rachel: Well, you know he's always had a crush on me, it shouldn't be that hard.  
  
Julie: Well, uh, have fun!  
  
Rachel: Yeah! Okay watch me work. (Goes to the counter)  
  
Ross: She's actually gonna do this?  
  
Chandler: (chuckles) Yeah, apparently its their monthly girls day out thing. It's cute.  
  
Ross: Yeah, she---they are.  
  
Julie: I'm gonna go use the bathroom, okay honey?  
  
Ross: Yeah, okay. (They kiss, she leaves)  
  
Joey: What was that?  
  
Ross: What?  
  
Chandler: The obvious protectiveness of Rachel you used to show.  
  
Ross: Oh, c'mon guys, I'm with Julie now.  
  
Chandler: Oh, please. Even Joey noticed it! (Joey nods)  
  
Ross: Just give me a break. (Chandler and Joey sigh. They all sip their coffee and do whatever they were doing before, I don't know. Periodically Ross looks over at Rachel)  
  
Chandler: (catching him) Dude!  
  
Ross: What?  
  
Chandler: (pauses) Wow, I can't even think of a good joke here.  
  
Ross: Um, OK. I'm gonna get some more coffee!  
  
Joey: (to Chandler) He's lost it again. (Chandler nods in agreement)  
  
Rachel: ...and I just said to myself `Gee, this could be a little tighter', you know? (Gunther nods excitedly, Ross walks up)  
  
Ross: Hey you two. Can I get some coffee Gunther?  
  
Gunther: Sure, (quietly as he turns around) dirtbag. Get your own girl.  
  
Ross: So, Rach. Um, how's life?  
  
Rachel: Well, it's fine. Thanks for asking. How's it going with Julie? (We see Phoebe and Monica come back and sit down back on the couch emotionless, Rachel doesn't notice)  
  
Ross: Oh, it's fine thanks. So, are you girls going to just have some fun today?  
  
Rachel: Yup, Gunther gave me the day off! (Gunther returns with coffee, smiles)  
  
Ross: Well that's good. Nice blouse by the way. Just get it? (Gunther grunts angrily and walks off)  
  
Rachel: Oh, this? Yeah, just yesterday. Thanks for noticing. Oh! The girls are back! (They go to the couch, Julie returns from the bathroom at the same time. As they come back, Chandler eyes Ross weirdly, Ross looks back innocently) So did you do it?  
  
Monica: No! (Does this as only Courtney Cox Arquette can)  
  
Rachel: What? Why?  
  
Phoebe: You have the camera!!! (Rachel slowly looks down at her bulging coat pocket.)  
  
Rachel: Oh. (Phoebe and Monica nod angrily) OK, then let's just find something else to do!  
  
Phoebe: OK, then so much for plan A. Oh! Monica, Rachel! (They gather near her and Phoebe whispers something. They all snicker and giggle)  
  
Rachel: You are so bad!  
  
Joey: What?  
  
Mon/Rach/Phoebe: Nothing!  
  
Ross: Come on girls. What are you gonna do?  
  
Rachel: That's none of your business, Geller.  
  
Ross: Not like I care, Green.  
  
Julie: (cutting in) Well, I think we have to catch that reservation.  
  
Ross: Oh, right. We better head off then. Bye guys!  
  
Gang: Bye you two! /See ya/Later/etc.  
  
Chandler: So really, what are you girls gonna do?  
  
Rachel: Just something REALLY hilarious!  
  
Joey: Does it involve sex? (The girls stare at him)  
  
Monica: No, Joey!  
  
Phoebe: Well, actually it does. (Rachel and Monica nod. Joey whimpers and looks at Chandler)  
  
Chandler: Leave! Stop tormenting us! (The girls leave the coffeeshop)  
  
[Restaurant. Ross and Julie are seated in a booth with menus.]  
  
Ross: ...that's why my theory is possible.  
  
Julie: But think, Ross. (BTW, I have NO CLUE what I'm writing about here!) The cretaceous period had a Temperate Zone, how could Diplodocus possibly survive within the last segment of that time period?  
  
Ross: Look, I'll have you read my paper later.  
  
Julie: OK. So, what are we eating?  
  
Ross: Oh, I'm not very hungry. Just a sandwich and salad, probably.  
  
Julie: that sounds good.  
  
Ross: So, I haven't asked yet. What do you think of my friends? Were they nice to you? Please tell me they were.  
  
Julie: Oh, Ross. They were nice, don't worry. That guy Joey was a little too nice.  
  
Ross: Yeah, you might want to steer clear of Joey.  
  
Julie: Yeah. Well anyway, the girls seem really close. They've been friends a long time, have they?  
  
Ross: Well, long story short, Monica and Rachel have been friends since elementary, so I've known Rachel for a long time as well. And Phoebe's been a part of them for years and years. So yeah, they're pretty close. Today was their little day out thing, so they were acting weirder than they normally would. (Starts chuckling) Wasn't that funny? Rachel had the camera in her jacket!  
  
Julie: Um, yeah Ross. Well, sounds like a tight group of friends you have.  
  
Ross: Uh, yeah I guess. (Waiter approaches them, scene fades out)  
  
[Fades to: The campus of NYU. We zoom around and then finally see the girls walking around with the video camera. Zoom towards them as they approach a guy reading on a bench]  
  
Phoebe: (holding the camera) Hi, we'd like to ask you a few questions for a citywide video survey we're making.  
  
Guy: Uh, sure. No problem.  
  
Rachel: Great! Let's start. Um, first tell your name to the camera please.  
  
(The rest of this scene is from the view of the camera)  
  
Guy: Well, Hi. I'm Frankie Gibson.  
  
Monica: (OS) Hey Frankie. What's the best date you've ever had?  
  
Frankie: Well...  
  
[Cut to: Another male on camera, obviously in the park]  
  
Guy2: ...and ended with this amazing soul-lifting kiss at her front porch that I'll never forget.  
  
Phoebe: Great answer, Craig. Now, what's the best sex you've ever had? Details, please.  
  
Craig: I think that the all time best one was when...  
  
[Cut to: Female on camera sitting at a table eating a muffin.]  
  
Female: ... so no. I never found out his name. And I still sometimes go to the dark alleyway when I'm lonely now, but he's never returned.  
  
Rachel: (in tears, OS) Wow. OK, Becky. What has been the kinkiest thing you've ever done in bed so far?  
  
Becky: Oh that's easy. It all started with this foreign exchange student in Home Economics one day, when...  
  
[Cut to: Another female on camera, sitting on the couch in Central Perk.]  
  
Female2: I can't divulge that information.  
  
Phoebe: (OS) OK, listen! You've said that to every question we've asked including you're name, mystery girl! Now give us some answers or I'll have to kick your ass all the way to Timbuktu!  
  
Mystery Girl: (obviously scared) OK! I-I-I'll talk. Umm, the kinkiest was most definitely with this girl only about a couple days ago, her name was Mona. (AN: I don't get future scripts like a lot of people do, but I wish I did. I just think it would be totally awesome to see Ross freak out about a perhaps "incident" many years' back of "experimentation". That would drive him safely to Rachel's arms!)  
  
[Cut to: First guy, Frankie.]  
  
Monica: (OS) And last but not least, have you ever been cheated on or cheated on somebody else? Tell us about it.  
  
Frankie: Well, only been cheated on.  
  
[Cut to] Craig: Been cheated on a couple times...  
  
[Cut to] Becky: I regret cheating on him sometimes, but with Giorgio, it was worth it.  
  
[Cut to] Mystery Girl: Cheating is a sin!  
  
(View returns to normal with mystery Girl on couch)  
  
Rachel: All right then, thanks for your time, ummm, mystery girl. (MG leaves)  
  
Phoebe: Wow, you guys. That was supposed to be just a dirty survey.  
  
Monica: I know! Now my eyes are red and my cheeks are tear-stained!  
  
Rachel: New York is full of love! How touching!!  
  
Phoebe: Okay, we'll have to save this tape for a sappy day.  
  
Rachel: oh, count on it!  
  
Monica: Right now, let's get a little coffee. (Phoebe and Monica get up to the counter)  
  
Rachel: Um, you guys go ahead. I'm gonna be right back. Don't go anywhere!  
  
Phoebe: Don't worry, we won't! Where are you going?  
  
Rachel: You'll find out soon enough.  
  
[Cut to: Ross and Julie walking along holding hands on a sidewalk, its getting pretty dark out.]  
  
Julie: Well, it's just that you talk about her a lot.  
  
Ross: Are you joking with me? (Julie stares at him) Julie, she's been one of my best friends since we were little! It's natural that I talk about her! (stops) Hey look at me. I really like you, and I'm sorry if I've made you feel otherwise.  
  
Julie: Really?  
  
Ross: You bet! (They continue to walk, and walk into Central Perk)  
  
[Inside Central Perk. Joey, Chandler, Monica and Phoebe are there now. Ross and Julie enter.]  
  
Ross: Hey guys. (All wave hi, and the couple sits down) What's been going on?  
  
Chandler: Joey's trained Gunther to respond to a snap whenever he wants coffee.  
  
Joey: (excited) the man's like a trained puppy dog!  
  
Ross: Awesome.  
  
Julie: So, where's Rachel?  
  
Monica: Off in a secret location apparently, but she should be back soon.  
  
Phoebe: Hopefully, we have invites to Ugly Naked Guy's party at 10.  
  
Monica: Oh, she'll be back by then! Besides I thought we agreed we weren't going to go!  
  
Joey: Woah, wait. Ugly Naked Guy's place? A party? (pause) Does it have naked chicks?  
  
Monica: You can have our invites, Joe.  
  
Chandler: Hey! Me too! Me too!  
  
Julie: Sorry for interrupting, but who is "Ugly Naked Guy"?  
  
Ross: He lives across the street from Monica, they can see into his apartment. Oh by the way, how did you get invites?  
  
Phoebe: Well it turns out the guy knows sign language. Which I used to communicate with him through Monica's window last Thursday! (suddenly Rachel bursts in carrying a big unmarked bag)  
  
Rachel: (breathlessly) Guys!  
  
Monica: Rach! Where have you been?  
  
Phoebe: Yeah! And what's in the bag?  
  
Rachel: (pointing at Phoebe for her last question, still breathless and regaining energy) You guys remember the place we went to last time? You know with the greatest drinks of all time?  
  
Monica: How could we forget?!  
  
Rachel: Well, it's closing down. And just before he officially locked up the bar...  
  
Phoebe: (yelling) NO!  
  
Rachel: Yes!  
  
Monica: NO!!!!  
  
Rachel: YES!!!!  
  
Phoebe: You mean...  
  
Rachel: Oh, yeah. It's time for...  
  
The Girls in Unison: M...M...M! (they all run out, and I mean lightning speed!)  
  
Julie: M M M?  
  
Ross: Midnight Margarita Madness.  
  
Joey: (whining tone) drunk hot chicks in the next apartment with the door locked! (looks up) Why are you doing this to me?  
  
Chandler: Well, Joe... (Rachel rushes back in towards Ross and Julie)  
  
Rachel: (breathless) Ross!  
  
Ross: What? What is it?  
  
Rachel: (regaining strength again) What are you and Julie doing tonight?  
  
Ross: Well, we've got reservations at the Rainbow Room, can't miss it.  
  
Rachel: Dammit, Geller! Julie was supposed to join us!  
  
Ross: Oh, well I'm sorry, but these are important reservations, Green.  
  
Rachel: Uggh, you're no fun!  
  
Ross: Right, and you're a barrel of laughs.  
  
Rachel: (playfully hits him) All right ten. (she rushes back out, Ross watches her leave)  
  
Julie(coughs): Ahem  
  
Chandler: Hey, Joe. Don't we have to be somewhere?  
  
Joey: Ummm....  
  
Chandler: That's right! We do! (Chandler grabs Joey and they leave)  
  
Julie: what was that?  
  
Ross: What was what?  
  
Julie: That!  
  
Ross: What?  
  
Julie: you can forget about the Rainbow Room tonight. I'm gonna go get drunk! (she leaves)  
  
Ross: What the hell was that about?  
  
[Cut to: Monica & Rachel's. The three girls are there on the couch laughing hysterically, not drunk enough to have their speech slurred quite yet ]  
  
Rachel: HA! That's five oreos! Pay up!  
  
Phoebe: No fair! (throws an oreo at Rachel, Monica laughs harder)  
  
Rachel: That's not funny! (throws the whole pack at Monica. Laughter is now uncontrollable)  
  
Phoebe: (through laughter) Hey, you guys remember last month when we made up that dance?  
  
Monica: Oh my god, let's do that!  
  
Rachel: Yes! (turns on the stereo, "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mixalot comes on. I don't care if wasn't out then) Phoebe! Let's do the intro.!!  
  
Phoebe: Yeah! (she starts) Oh my god, Becky. Look at her butt. It is so big. (she starts laughing)  
  
Rachel: She looks like one of those rap guys' girlfriends! (she starts laughing too) But who understands those rap guys' anyways. (all three girls laugh continually until...)  
  
Monica: I like big butts and I cannot lie! (she laughs, the girls start doing this dance thing and sing, don't ask me, it's just a fanfic)  
  
Phoebe: You other brothers can't deny! (Julie walks in! Nobody notices)  
  
Rachel: When a girl walks in with a itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get SPRUNG! (she laughs really hard, Julie looks down and walks out. Scene fades out on the girls)  
  
[Scene cuts to later at Monica and Rachel's. The stereo now plays "True Colors" by Jill Scott. The girls are now lying across the living room clutching margaritas]  
  
Rachel: Good song.  
  
Monica: I think the last time I listened to this was...Um....a long time ago.  
  
Phoebe: OK, Question number th........Um.......Next question!!!  
  
Rachel: OK, OK. Phoebe, what do you REALLY think of Chandler?  
  
Phoebe: Oh that's an easy one. He's really cheezy.  
  
Monica: Cheezy?  
  
Phoebe: Yeah, OH! And he needs to find someone. Maybe Monica!  
  
Rachel: Yeah that'll happen! OK, next question!  
  
Phoebe: OK, Rachel.  
  
Rachel: Yes?  
  
Phoebe: What do you REALLY think of Ross?  
  
Rachel: REALLY sweet guy. Too bad he's taken, I would have gone for him now! (the three start chuckling, but not full-fledged laughing. "El Tango de Roxanne" from Moulin Rouge comes on, our theme song!)  
  
Monica: Ross! No boys allowed!  
  
Rachel: Actually, we were just talking about you!!!( alughs0  
  
Ross: Um, OK. Hey, is Julie here?  
  
Phoebe: Nope, haven't seen her! Hey, want a margarita?  
  
Rachel: Oh, yeah! They're grrrrrrrrrrrreat!  
  
Ross: I don't know.  
  
Rachel: oh, c'mon you wuss! (she gets up and gives him her margarita)  
  
Ross: Oh, all right then. One won't hurt.  
  
[Scene changes to the next morning. All of the girls and Ross are spread out across the apartment. Phoebe's in the kitchen, Monica's on the window couch thing, and Rachel has passed out on Ross' lap in the living room. Chandler, Joey and Julie walk in. The stereo is still playing, it's "You Make Me Sick" by Pink.]  
  
Chandler: Anyone home? (sees everyone) Wow, where's that camera?  
  
Joey: (pointing) Hey, how did Ross get in? (looks up) That's crossing a line! It's unfair!  
  
Julie: (goes over to Ross and shakes him) Ross, Ross wake up. (he does)  
  
Ross: Woah, where am I?  
  
Julie: Come on, we gotta talk. (she picks him up and they go outside the apartment, the camera follows them outside, music fades)  
  
Julie: I just wanted to say that, I think we should stop seeing each other.  
  
Ross: (MAJOR hangover happening in his brain) Wha?  
  
Julie: I think we should see other people!  
  
Ross: Shhh! There are bees in my head!  
  
Julie: Oy! (gets a pen out of her pocket and writes on his hand, I'm breaking up with you Bye, Julie. She leaves)  
  
Ross: Woah, I gotta lie down.  
  
[Cut to: Later that night, the six of them are sitting at Central Perk. Hangovers have gone away ]  
  
Chandler: Sorry, man.  
  
Ross: No, it's OK. It's my fault anyway.  
  
Rachel: How is it your fault?  
  
Ross: Well, I just kept talking...it's nothing. Oh well. I really wanted it to work out, too. This bites!  
  
Monica: It'll get better, bro.  
  
Ross: It better.  
  
Rachel: Oh it will, you'll see honey. (Ross looks at her. They share a `moment'. Rachel looks away)  
  
Joey: So, Ross. What are we going to do tonight? Please tell me you're in phase two!  
  
Ross: I don't think there'll be a phase two this time, Joey.  
  
Joey: Dammit! Are you sure?  
  
Ross: Well, we'll have to see. (Joey high fives him)  
  
Chandler: So, you wanna hang out tonight then, buddy?  
  
Ross: OK, but just at your place. I'm not in phase two just yet.  
  
Joey: Oh, you will be. (Chandler and Ross look at him funny)  
  
Ross: OK, let's go then. Bye girls.  
  
Girls: Bye Ross/See ya/Feel better (the boys leave)  
  
Phoebe: OK, Rach. What was that?  
  
Rachel: What was what?  
  
Monica: That!  
  
Rachel: What? (Déjà vu?)  
  
Monica: The `honey' thing.  
  
Rachel: Mon, I call everyone honey! (Ever notice that?)  
  
Phoebe: oh, you're not getting out of this on a technicality!  
  
Rachel: (pause) What?  
  
Monica: OK, do you like Ross?  
  
Rachel: He's one of my bestest friends, how could I not?  
  
Phoebe: No, do you LIKE him, like him?  
  
Rachel: Like in the LIKE way? (Mon & Phoebe nod. Rachel pauses) I don't know. I don't THINK so.  
  
Monica: I KNEW it!  
  
Rachel: Oh, please you guys, it's nothing.  
  
Phoebe: Yeah, nothing. (Monica and Phoebe high five)  
  
[Chandler and Joey's. The guys are there. Joey's on the phone, Chandler and Ross are on the chairs, "Lady Marmalade" from Moulin Rouge is heard.]  
  
Ross: Pick a good channel!  
  
Chandler: Ross, you just got out of a relationship. Nothing is more healing than sexy MTV ladies, except maybe Baywatch. Besides, Joey's really anxious to take you to a strip club.  
  
Joey: OK, I got us the Joey special. So Ross, you feeling kind of vulnerable?  
  
Ross: Well, a little.  
  
Joey: Feeling down?  
  
Ross: Yeah.  
  
Joey: Need some company?  
  
Ross: Well, yeah.  
  
Joey: then strip joints are the answer for YOU! (chandler and Ross roll their eyes) What?  
  
Chandler: You never cease to amaze me, Joey.  
  
Joey: Um, thanks!  
  
[Monica & Rachel's. Monica, Rachel and Phoebe are entering]  
  
Phoebe: All right, girls. Now that you're home, I'm just gonna go and get some rest tonight.  
  
Rachel: Oh, all right. Bye Pheebs!  
  
Monica: Yeah, bye! (Phoebe leaves)  
  
Rachel: (sighs) So, what do we do now?  
  
Monica: Well, I agree with Phoebe, I'm gonna go to bed early.  
  
Rachel: Sounds like a good idea. Good night, Mon.  
  
Monica: Night. (they enter their rooms)  
  
[Monica & Rachel's. A little later. The apartment seems undisturbed and peaceful. There is a light coming from Rachel's room but that's all. Ross enters.]  
  
Ross: (softly) Hello? (notices the light) Why not? (he walks towards Rachel's room)  
  
[Rachel's room. She's reading a book with the bedside lamp on and has a bowl of skittles next to her when Ross enters]  
  
Ross: Hey, Rach.  
  
Rachel: (startled) Oh! Oh, Ross. You startled me a little.  
  
Ross: Sorry.  
  
Rachel: That's all right.  
  
Ross: Well, I saw your light on, and thought I'd say hi. Joey and Chandler were being a little obnoxious.  
  
Rachel: I can imagine. (pause, there's a bit of tension) You OK?  
  
Ross: Me? Oh, I'm good. Good. (notices the book) What are you reading?  
  
Rachel: Oh, it's called "Deck the Halls" by Carol and Mary Higgins Clark. (the book wasn't out then, so sue me)  
  
Ross: Oh, they wrote one together?  
  
Rachel: Yeah, it's really good. It's a real good storyline, I like it a lot. Except some of the dialogue is kinda cheesy. Come here, look at this. (motions for Ross to come over and sit down on the bed, he does so) Look at this scene, with the kidnappers.  
  
Ross: (chuckles) THEY'RE criminals?!  
  
Rachel: (giggles) Well, they're new at it, I think.  
  
Ross: Sure looks like it.  
  
Rachel: Hey, Ross?  
  
Ross: Yeah, Rach?  
  
Rachel: I'm real sorry about Julie.  
  
Ross: Oh, that's OK. Guess it wasn't really meant to be, anyway. (smiles at her, she smiles back)  
  
Rachel: So, you want to read with me?  
  
Ross: You wouldn't mind me reading over your shoulder?  
  
Rachel: Nah, it's OK. I'm used to it, Jill used to do it all the time.  
  
Ross: OK, then. (He sits up against the backboard and Rachel leans on his chest. They read in silence, every so often the page turns or Rachel eats some of the skittles.)  
  
Rachel: Oh, how sad.  
  
Ross: I know. (Rachel eats some more skittles) What's the matter? You don't like the red ones?  
  
Rachel: (Looking up at him) Oh, no I love them! I kinda save them for last to savor them. Is that stupid?  
  
Ross: No, not at all. (they continue to read. Soon Rachel runs out of skittles) Hey, why don't I get you some more?  
  
Rachel: (smiles) Oh, really? Thanks, honey.  
  
Ross: (smiles) No problem. (Ross leaves, and comes back a little later)  
  
Rachel: Hey, what took you so long?  
  
Ross: Oh, thought I'd just make it easier for you. (Shows her bowl full of only red skittles) Hope that's okay.  
  
Rachel: That's so sweet. Thanks. (smiles) hey, sit!  
  
Ross: Right, (he sits) Rach?  
  
Rachel: Yeah?  
  
Ross: Nothing.  
  
Rachel: Ross, what is it?  
  
Ross: I know this may sound stupid, but I wanted to ask you something.  
  
Rachel: Shoot.  
  
Ross: Okay, um. Do you, do you remember the first night you came here to Monica's?  
  
Rachel: Vaguely. OH!  
  
Ross: What?  
  
Rachel: (realizes what he's talking about) Ross, it won't sound stupid.  
  
Ross: It won't?  
  
Rachel: Just ask, sweetie. (they smile)  
  
Ross: Okay, Rach. Um, so how about it? Would you like to have dinner with me, sometime, maybe? And again don't let my vulnerability become a factor in anyway. (they laugh)  
  
Rachel: I'd really love that, you know I really would. (they smile at each other)  
  
Ross: Okay then. (points to the book) So, where were we?  
  
Rachel: (ignores the book) Somewhere around here. (kisses Ross. OF course, starts of awkward but then incredibly passionate. They stay lip-locked as the camera fades to black)  
  
Well, I sure would have preferred it this way! The End! 


End file.
